Dreading My Children's Fundraisers


If you are a parent with school-age children and/or children involved in extra-curricular activities then you can probably relate to the statement above!  
I have 3 children and each one of them brings home so many requests for fundraising activities that the neighbors actually turn off their porch lights when they see my kids coming-afraid of how much the glossy brochures they are clutching in their hands are going to cost them this time! Trust me, I understand what they are feeling and the kids are very careful to place the latest money drive campaign for their activity in an obvious spot in my room and then run for their lives before they can see me weep!


For the parents who have yet to experience this unavoidable phenomenon, I hope the following information will help prepare you for the barrage of requests to part you from your hard-earned cash; all in the name of a good and worthy cause: your child.  From the day the new school year begins until approximately mid-February each year, plan on spending your week-ends selling over-priced pies, cookie dough, "fun shaped" pasta,  popcorn, nuts, girl scout cookies, wrapping paper, jewelry, candles and many other items that you are told you can't live without.  Please notice that I did say that YOU will be selling these items-not your children-because, as you will discover, even though the person in charge of the fundraising effort for their particular group will do their best to fill your children's heads with images of all the GREAT PRIZES  that they will receive if they only sell 35 items, your children will only remain motivated for 2 days or until they have visited the neighbors on your street-and then they will promptly forget all about it until the day it is due. You, on the other hand, will receive e-mails, text messages and  reminders at each meeting or ballgame that the fate of the PTA or league is in your hands and that without the fundraiser profits they would have to double your registration fees or your children would go without the proper learning aids they need in school.

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Thought for the Day:  Mothers with only one child should not even be allowed to speak to mothers with multiple children!

I do mean that in the nicest way because all mothers deserve admiration but I have found that mothers with only one child just can't possibly understand how different it is to have more than one.

• I hear -"You are always late" from the stay at home mom with only one child every week when we meet to go to boy scouts together.  I want to scream and poke pins in a voodoo doll resembling this mother when she says that to me.  Hello? I worked all day at the office; raced from one end of town picking up one daughter from girl scouts all the way across to the other end of town to pick up the other from dance; somehow managed to feed all 3 children something quick for dinner; and then loaded the van and met you-And you are actually complaining because i am 6 minutes late??  We mutually agreed to never ride together anywhere ever again before our friendship disintegrated over this!
• Then there is always the "Hey, let's all go to __________, it's alot of fun and pretty reasonably priced".  That is, if the cost is even mentioned, which it is often not.  Yes, a trip to the movies may only cost you $20.00 but it is double that for me.  Season passes to Six Flags are a great deal at $55.00 each but triple that for me.  
• OR mothers with one child will go to the opposite extreme and try to tell me how expensive it is to raise a child these days! They have no clue how much school supplies for the twins and their older sister cost, or school clothes, or tripling the fee for their child's extracurricular activity so that each child may participate in something they enjoy, or the joy's of the school fundraiser times three.  I actually remember having money leftover at the end of the week when my daughter was still an only child! Those were the days.
• Mothers with one child actually know what is packed in their child's overnight bag and worry when their child skins a knee.  Mothers of multiple children are just glad if their child remembered to pack clean underwear and socks that aren't crusty and the only time our feathers get ruffled is when a bone is sticking out of the skin or blood is pouring from their forehead!
• And if their child is the same age as one of your younger children, these mothers actually think that they will not have to go through the same anguish when their child becomes a "tween"; that their child would never talk back or cuss in front of adults or get caught with a Facebook before they had permission.  That somehow, mothers of multiple children have lower standards or morals than they do.  It couldn't possibly be a normal part of puberty and growing up or a rite of passage that all parents dread and receiving some forewarning and advice about the behavior of adolescents might make their journey easier!

At the end of the day, it boils down to this:  Mothers with only one child should not even be allowed to speak to mothers with multiple children.